One of those mornings

Thursday morning started with a 7am wake up call from the little bear. There was no convincing her to go back to sleep so up I got. Or I thought I was up. Weak willed non-morning person that I am, I put Sesame Street on (thank heaven for Netflix) and proceeded to lay down on the sofa. Well, an unspecified amount of time later I woke up to the credits (stop counting!) and a pre-chewed mound of pretzel on the sofa directly infront of my face. Mark was home too, he was just getting ready for work - it's not as if I fell asleep and let my toddler run amok. (well not mostly) Attempting to dress myself and the child simultaneously I learned that my jeans don't really fit. Sure I can wear them out of the house, but will I be comfortable in them? No. I'm pretty sure I need to shed about 10 more pounds before the majority of my clothes will fit again. Gee, thanks for that early morning 'you're fat' reminder jeans.

Drive Mark into work. Leave Jessica in the back seat all alone with a tub of Gerber cheddar puffs. I knew what would happen but the part of my brain that was temporarily in control didn't care. I just wanted to get to the Barnes and Nobles story time without a carseat meltdown. (Baby cheetos solve most of the world's ails at this point.) Arrive at Barnes and Nobles roughly an hour early. I was not going to drive home just to get her out of the car for 10 minutes before getting her back into the car. (Why can't the mall open at 9am?) Yes, this is the same story-time we attempted back in January. However, this time we were meeting a few of the amazing moms we've met in Stroller Strides so things were bound to go better, and it did! Jessica fell in love with two little girls who were about 6 or 7. They were the very quiet soft spoken type and were happy to have her sit between them on the bench. Jessica sat on that bench swinging her legs through the ENTIRE story! At one point the story teller asked who was brave and a lot of the kids raised their hands. Jessica looked all around her for a minute and then put both her hands in the air. It was adorable!

After a successful story-time we headed over to the mall. The stroller wasn't actually in the car but the Ergo was. Shopping with a baby in an Ergo is one thing. Wanting to try things on when the only thing containing your baby is an Ergo? Completely different thing. I debated back and forth for what felt like ages and then made the wrong decision. Yes. I decided to let her out of the ergo and to try something on. Baaad idea. In the end they didn't have the color in the style I was looking for so off we headed to the food court.

By this point I was starving. Getting Jessica back into the Ergo after tasting freedom should be an Olympic sport. I decided to get a parmesan pretzel in hopes that Jessica would enjoy it too. Nope. Shrieks of rage. Obviously the parmesan pretzel was an attempt by her mother to poison her. Only logical answer. It was dry and not worth the $2.50 I paid for it but you didn't see me shrieking and throwing it in the face of the man who sold it to me.

Definitely time to leave the mall. On the long walk back to the car I was "that mother" the one with the rabid child. I was embarrassed and wanted nothing more than to sprint out of the mall.. sprinting with a toddler in an ergo? Yeah, not possible. I felt like any second the good parent police would swoop down on me and demand to know what I done to my child to incite such anger.

After a few wrong turns we made it home. Jessica, of course, fell asleep 2 minute before we arrived at the apartment. I decided to drive up to our floor so I could, hopefully, carry her sleeping baby self in without waking her up.
Extract baby from car seat without waking - check!
Find keys without waking baby - check!
Open door into the hallway and... what???! Why is the carpet red? Why are the walls red? Where am I?! I'd accidently parked on the third floor instead of the fourth. There was no way I'd be able to keep her asleep and put her back into the car so we headed for the stairs. Alas. Unsuccessful. Awake baby. No nap in our near future.

The afternoon fared better - we went to a friend's house to play and then collected Daddy from work and she took a catnap in the car on the way home.

I'm pretty sure I learned my lesson. Never take a toddler to the mall on your own. NEVER.